Tuesday, June 06, 2006

First Foster Care follow up

He was a nice 11-year old boy just at my home for respite (regular foster parents get 2 days of respite a month) so his foster mom and dad could go off for an anniversary weekend. He spent most of his time on the computer surfing the Lego Star Wars figures and outside fighting the neighbors with his lightsabers. He is seriously into Star Wars.


I did get really upset at one thing though... When I talked to the foster mom, she mentioned she knew it was my first time. (A bit of background - the social worker called me last month to take two sisters long term. We worked on it for over a week and then I decided not to take the girls. It was a tough decision. And then the social worker gave me new info and I felt I might have made the wrong decision. Arrrrgh. Anyway, I think the social worker thought I was feeling a bit gun shy about jumping into the foster parenting thing.)

Back to the story... I didn't mind the social worker telling the foster mom so much BUT the foster mom then told the boy that he had to be really good at my house because he was the first child I had. AND if he wasn't good and I didn't have a good experience, I wouldn't do foster care.

OMG!!! What a load to lay on a poor kid!!! I was sooo mad. I did talk to the boy and several times through the weekend told him he was doing good, my decision didn't hang on him... etc. I think he got it by the end of the weekend but still! I did tell the social worker who thanked me for the feed back. Hopefully this won't happen again.

The joys of working in a government system...

11 comments:

Marty said...

I'm glad all went well! That's such a good thing your doing.

K said...

Thats so funny about his star wars obsession. I tend to forget my own childhood obsessions and how their so different from the adult kind. I constantly dreamed of living with care bears and my little ponies when I was little.

Glad you two had such a good weekend.

Klondike Kate said...

I dreamed about being itty-bitty and living inside the pattern made by the linoleum on the bathroom floor. Does that make me weird?

Kiana said...

Haha, no way! Thats actually a pretty good one.

Anonymous said...

Glad to hear it went so well.

Jenn

Lisa said...

I grew up in foster care. You are very perceptive.

That's a heavy load for that young man to have weighing on his shoulders. If he fails, to be forever rejected.

Please check out my blog sometime. The consequences for foster children and teens are so intense when compared to children and teens who grow up in "normal families."

Thank you for opening your heart to this young man. His Star Wars obsession makes perfect sense:

1.) Star Wars is cool.

2.) The force and the dark side are so clear-cut. That can be so reassuring to a kid dealing with the amiguity of humanity.

Lisa
http://sunshinegirlonarainyday.blogspot.com/

Klondike Kate said...

thanks for the comments Lisa. I did check out your blog. I'll keep dropping by. Thanks for the encouragement. I wish we could find a better way to help our kids...

Anonymous said...

Looking for information and found it at this great site...
»

Anonymous said...

Best regards from NY! Buy cheap soma online what is fioricet Anxiety drugs buspar Best free spyware removal Maine boys high school class a basketball finals Penis + butt Large+bathtubs Shasta travel trailer 15' Online selling food products affiliate marketing order butalbital

Anonymous said...

Best regards from NY! »

Anonymous said...

best regards, nice info » » »