Only for family would I do this...

Just for Valette. Happy Birthday! "Put your well-manicured left foot in.."

Labia piercing for boys

This was hillarious - and not for the prudish or squeemish!

Fear factor

Starting a new business in a new state was intimidating for one reason - taxes. Alaska is wonderfully tax-free. Apparently everywhere else isn't.

So I procrastinated until the last day (today) and figured out how to use the e-file system. Turns out I had to fill in one - count them one - entry and that was it.

And since I made such a pathetic amount my first year I didn't even owe any tax!

Suprising parent

I've really enjoyed being closer to my parents. One, my mother feeds me an awful lot - and it's all healthy. Probably the only vegetables I eat in the week. Two they have a great big screen TV. And three, in my new currently single state, there's nothing like family support and hugs.

So that sappy tribute aside, Mom was in the hospital overnight after surgery so (naturally) Dad and I went to dinner. On the way there Dad mentioned when he had had a bit part in a play in college. What - my dad had an inclination toward theatre?!?!? So apparently he build sets and run lights the first two years in HS and a bit in college and - get this - in Austin, Tx after college where he met my mom. He decided to get involved in community theatre to meet people.

This is a whole new side to my dad. Picturing him as a young college grad, in a new city, trying to make friends, choosing the theatre - it's very mind blowing and cool at the same time.

Classic update

I love this!

(Thanks to Valette)

Self Appointed

It's official. Do you know which one? =-)

Toxic Air

A fertilizer plant in the next town caught fire when an employees truck, parked inside, caught fire (that dude is soooo fired!). Anyway, the chemical fire cannot be smothered with water b/c that would cause additional air pollution and runoff into a nearby stream. And they can't smother it with fire retardant 'cause you mix the fire department stuff with the fertilizer stuff and you have a potential for an explosion. Can you say fertilizer bomb?

So the road was closed for about a day but unfortunately the closed area was right after my exit to work. So I still had to go in. The air smelled lovely and it gave me a headache. I should get workers comp.

such an idiot

So I bought a great AT&T phone system about 2 months ago from Costco. It has an answering machine with three mailboxes and four cordless phones and their own charger/bases. Very cool.

So 1 goes to the entry, one by the couch, one by my desk and one in my bedroom. So I notice odd things about the bedroom phone - never charges completely, always blinking.... so I switch it out with another set. Works fine for awhile then dies again. So I'm without a phone in the bedroom.

So finally I start thinking about using the warranty when the phone starts working! Timing! Then it dies again. Then I walk into my bedroom and notice the blinking light of doom on the phone, again. I switch on the lights and something is odd. The blinking light of doom goes off.

OMG - I've plugged the phone into the only outlet that's controlled by the light switch at the door. I am such an airhead!

Thought for the day

My new favorite quote:

"Life should not be measured by how many breaths we take, but by what takes our breath away."
Carl Sagan

So, what took your breath away this week?

Moving!

I'm moving to a new apartment next month. My lease is up in the current place and before renewing I thought I'd check out other options.

Now I hate moving so the incentive would have to be pretty big.

I found a three bedroom place for $25 less per month than the current 2 bedroom place. Now that's incentive.

The master bedroom closet has the washer/dryer hookups (?!) so the big bedroom will be storage, my study/office and laundry room. The middle, small bedroom will be for my roommate and the front, slightly bigger room will be mine.

The kitchen and living room are much bigger with room for two peoples food and kitchen utensils. And the front room has beautiful vaulted ceilings. So I think this will be a good thing.

Sad Moment

There are lots of things I miss about being married and specifically about my husband.

Like how he used to call me at work in the afternoon just to say hi.

That was so cool.

Euphamisms

I've heard many names for the penis. Some are formal such as "male member". Some are personal as when a man names his male member. Yesterday I heard a new one that I thought was hysterical...

Dingle.

That's it - just dingle. You have to giggle - I mean, really?!!

Exactly what kind of man has a dingle?

And how does dingle stack up to such other great penis names such as schlong, dick, cock, pecker and love muscle?

The new job

The new job is great! I really love being back in HR. And the office is a mess which is frustrating now but also exciting because I get to *organize*. Now some of you are yawning and nodding off but I really love organizing so I see it as lots of potential fun.

So I've been going through all the drawers and stuff and apparently the gal before me did nothing for two year - seriously. Everything is dated 2002 and older. How is this helpful? Employees keep asking me for benefit details and I can't answer. When are you vested in the 401k? Don't know because there is not *a single plan document*. How did she function?????

Thank goodness my trainer (called out of retirement) did tons of filing before I got on board. The trainer said the filing went back at least 1 year and some 18 months old. Geesh!

Weather Report

Weather here has been much nicer than Fairbanks - and I'm glad! Today was interesting though - I drove to work (25 miles) in freezing rain. It took 45 minutes.

At one downhill curve the traffic had come almost to a halt. I blinked my eyes several times to try and make sense of the two sided white rectangle I was seeing. Turns out that rectangle was the back end and right side of a semi with the cab completely jack-knifed out of sight. The semi was turned across both lanes of traffic and slid down the entire hill in the sideways positon.

My only regret is I didn't think to pull out my camera sooner.

Unreal Expectations

Things that should never have to be considered for elimination from the household budget:

1. Digital Cable (seriously, how do you know what's playing if you can't flip to schedule screen?)
2. High Speed Internet (dial-up? what's that?)
3. Netflix (movies are a necessary emotional food)
4. Diet Coke and Chocolate (I mean really, could the world function without this classic combo?)


Things that should be able to be eliminated from the household budget:

1. Rent (they expect payment?!? What's up with that?)
2. Electricity (candle light is so romantic)
3. Student Loan (has the education really paid me a dividend in a better salary?)
4. Car Payment (I got paperwork at the dealership - what's with this letter from the bank?)

Daylight

Note time stamp. Note mood. I am *not* a morning person.

Drug Screen

So the company sent me to pee in a cup. On demand. It took an hour.

How embarassing.

Just had to look

I just checked my resume file. I submitted my first resumes for a job in Washington while I was still in Fairbanks. First resume was sent April 1, 2004. Left Alaska May 5, 2004. Finally got a job 1/11/05. Only took 8 1/2 months. Jeepers!

Guess what????

I got the job!!! I got the job!!!! I'm employed again!!! Someone actually wanted to hire me!!! I am the new Human Resources Administrator at a large fruit processing plant in the area. More later but I just had to say - I got a job!!!!!!

Profile Picture

Thanks for the nice comments guys. I actually put this up here so I could have a picture in my profile. So far following the posted instructions isn't working. Grrr.

And in case you were wondering...

...I still haven't heard from the potential job that was checking my references. Sigh.

Gone to the dogs

Here's the playground where they spend most of their days...

They can find the softest, most pillow-iest place in the house.

Security

On the subject of changing my name...

There seem to be two schools of thought. 1 - my calling and identifying myself is enough to change my name on the given account. 2 - I may call and identify myself but I still need to fax in the divorce decree and new driver's license to prove the name change is legit.

Now 2 is definately more of a pain in the butt. 1 is very easy but leaves me feeling just a bit vulnerable. Now if it's my newspaper subscription - who cares? But when it's my credit card...I get a little concerned.

Changes

OK - let me just say getting divorced sucks. And all the changes that go with it are annoying as hell. Take, for example, name changes. I'm going back to my maiden name. Think of how many things have your name on them - utilities, credit cards, bank accounts, catalogs, checks - there's a ton of stuff.

Now changing my name the first time was great - I was newly married, I got lots of congratulations - it was very exciting and very affirming.

Now I have to say something like "I need to change my name due to divorce" and I get an "oooh" comment. Not that's there's anything really great to say but it's a far cry from when I first went through this.

I'm never getting married again. And if I do get married again I am not changing my name.

Completely disgusting

OMG - I'm completely grossed out.

I'm sitting on the couch enjoying catching up on my X-File episodes when the most horrendously disgusting smell fills the air. It smells like a dog just crapped in my lap.

Yet my two puppies are sleeping on the couch, right? I look over and it's obvious Glory has just puked. OK that's gross enough. But the smell of this crappy vomit can lead me to only one conclusion - she's been eating dog turds.

I think I'm going to be sick.

Snow

We actually had snowfall last night. A couple inches of wet heavy snow. Great for playing in, snotty for driving in. Anyway, a great friend posted this and I just think it's hysterical. Enjoy!

FYI - click on "this" in my post, then on "this" in the friends post to watch the little movie. Sorry, not savvy enough to figure how to create a direct link to the movie.

Strange diet

This was posted on a different sister-in-laws site. In spite of having living in Alaska my entire life (up until last May that is), I have never heard of nor experienced this. Very weird.

Cat??!?!?!

My family and friends in Alaska would be shocked to know I'm living with a cat. See, I'm allergic to cats. Well, my roommate has a cat. I was pretty desperate at the time to actually get a roommate in so I said we could do a trial.

At first Smokey was kept in the bedroom all the time. But even I got to feeling sorry for him. So now he's out when my roommate is home. My bedroom is absolutely off limits though!

Don't tell, but he's actually a really sweet cat.

Wet Dog 2

My babies got baths last night. They are so pitiful looking when they're this bedraggled! This is Glory, my female Shih Tzu. The picture above is my sweet Seby, a male Shih Tzu.

Wet Dog 1

Hope?

Well, they called but it wasn't good news. I didn't make the final cut. The lady said I interviewed well and they liked my enthusiasm and qualifications but since I was new to the area I didn't know the contacts for fundraising. Oh well.

They other interview went really well and the president of the company said I presented myself well. That was cool.

Also, the current HR lady called me to get a phone number for a reference. Calling my references is good, right?

Of course it probably would have been better if I had listed the right phone number on the reference form - and then didn't give her a fax - and then give her the right number only to realize I had mistyped the number on my resume... Geeesh!

Waiting

Still haven't called....

So they're busy and will call in the morning, right?

I'm so pitiful....

Bummed out

They haven't called....

Lights out

I turned over in bed this morning to discover my electronic alarm clock was off - power was out in the whole apartment. So I turned over and went back to sleep. And actually re-awoke in plenty of time for my interview.

Power was still out. I sighed. I saw a group of apartments in my complex last week that were out of power. And it is winter. Being from Alaska, I sort of expect power outages during the winter.

So I got creative and lit a bunch of candles in the bathroom so I could take a shower. And did my makeup by the daylight in the living room. The day I have an interview would be the day the power was out!

So it wasn't until late this afternoon that I had time to think about the power. I called home and didn't get the message machine which meant the power was still off. So I called the manager - she was shocked. She called the power company for me and no problems. None of the other attached units were without power - much to my suprise. So she asked if I had checked the breakers. Well no - it wasn't just part of the power but all the power. She went to the apartment and flipped the master breaker for me. Presto, bingo, power!

Grrrr. I could have had light this morning! I have to stop thinking in Alaska terms! =-)

Aced it!

I did so well at my job interview today! At least I think I did. I was able to answer all their questions with enthusiasm and really strong facts. I think I suprized them with the depth of my knowledge. They told me the successful candidates will be called tonight and given a second interview at the board meeting tomorrow evening.

Please call, please call, please call, please call, please call...

Maternal Instinct

I want to be a mom so bad I can taste it. I'm totally ready to adopt. I've got a few things to do first - like being able to pay all my monthly bills on a regular basis! =-) But I've been planning and dreaming. My favorite site is Adopt US Kids - http://www.adoptuskids.org

My heart just goes out to kids in the foster care system who want a family. But their chance for adoption is really low because of race, age or being part of a sibling group. So I'm ready for one, two or maybe three kids. Talk about instant mom! It's overwhelming just to think about it! Yet still...

I saw two sisters on the Adopt US Kids site. One is four with red hair (like my mom) and one was 6 with blond hair (like me!). If I could have reached through the computer to give them lots of hugs and love I would have.

Interview

I have a job interview today! And tomorrow! Finally! After months and months of submitting resumes and hearing nothing. I submitted 7 resumes for part-time positions right before the holidays. And now I have two interviews! And they're for really good positions!

The first interview is for the Executive Director position of a local teen pregnancy resource program. The ED! I've tried for two different Exec Dir positions and was a top candidate but didn't quite make it. I'm so psyched that this could be the one! And I'm not replacing anybody - the organization is adding an administrative layer. They're growing and are ready for an Exec Dir and I would get to set things up and organize! Yahoo!

The second is for the Human Resources Administrator for a local fruit company. Agriculture is very big in this area. And I've want to be in a pure HR position for the last several years. And the job is in the next town over - about 30 minutes away. Which is a commute but my parents are building in that town so I'd still be close to them!

This could be a very good two days!

Mental Health

Today I saw a counselor at my church. Recently divorced, dealing with depression, it seemed a good move. I've seen several counselors in the past and you get the same general type of thing. Talk about the past, analyse it, see how it affects the now, modify reactions.

This was really different in a way I almost can't explain. First, there was a lot of scripture reading. It almost made me feel I was back in 5th grade Christian School doing sword drills (find a Bible passage first). =-) The counselor talked about the passages we were reading (started with Romans 7, don't remember after that except they were all Pauline epistles). He discussed how we can really observe ourselves - kindof like a meta analysis of ourselves. We can see ourselves doing good and doing bad - even doing the bad even though we don't want to. Kind of like trying to get off caffine yet pulling over to the Quickie Mart for coffee - even though you don't want it.

So, we do bad we don't want to do and we can do good that God wants us to do. Then there was some stuff about how we do the good - salvation and freedom. The thing that sticks with me is the counselors assertion that the way toward freedom is crucifying of the bad self. Not a revelation but he specifically linked it to the stresses of life like the depression, anxiety.

There's so much he said. I really need to mull it over. Writing here helps. Isn't it weird that just doing a diary only I can see seems fruitless but to bare myself on the internet makes my musings more important?

Isn't she lovely

My New Year's toast to you all. Happy New Year!

PS - this is actually Klondike Kate. Very famous dancer in the Yukon at the turn of the century.

Interrupting

Ok - I'm apparently in the mood to chat.

I have a roommate. A very smart financial move on my part. And she's a nice roommate. She cleans - everything. I don't think I've done dishes or taken out the trash since she's been here.

But she's so very talkative. When I'm on the computer, she tells me a story about her niece. When I'm watching a movie, she tells me about her day. When I have the TV on she discusses the weather.

Now, I didn't grow up watching TV. So when I have the TV on I'm actually paying attention and watching the show - it's not a background, white noise kind of thing. And I hate people talking during a movie!

And I want to be polite. So I've tried making sure the TV is off for a bit when she comes home and wants to discuss her day (this is sounding waaaaaay too much like a relationship). To give her a hint, I'll pause the movie and turn to listen. I've ignored her. Even mentioned I was watching a show and didn't want to talk now. No change.

So I continue to be annoyed. Yet weighing my annoyance against never having to do the dishes or take out the trash.... Yup, I'll put up with it.

Just don't you interrupt my movie!

Bedside

I've found a church I like here. It's very large yet has great small group connections. It's probably the healthiest church I've been to in years.

Anyway, as you probably noted from my last few entries, I'm on a rather odd schedule. To bed between 2 and 4:30am; awaken between 10am and 1pm. Which causes a problem in getting to church. Even though the church has very smartly make second service at 10:45am.

Unfortunately, the last few weeks I've made the comment to my parents that I'm going to church in the morning and I'll talk to them later in the afternoon. Which means they ask how church was. Which means I have to say I didn't go. Which has now led to the very annoying question every Sunday afternoon "So, did you go to Bedside Baptist today?"

This was remotely amusing the first time and incredibly annoying everytime thereafter. They don't go to a weekly service so why should they care if I do? And why assume I didn't make it to church? (Well, that's a silly question.) Anyway - I hate that question.

And what's up with it being Baptist? Can't we have bedside Catholics or bedside Buddhists? Grrr. Now I'm really motivated to make it to church just to forever cut that question out of my life.

But, this is about my parents. Who I love dearly. Who will forever annoy me with pithy phrases.

So, where did you go to church today?

Near death experience

2:30am is probably not the best time to rearrange the closet to accomodate the Christmas decorations you just took down. 'Cause the shelf with all the large paintings and table leaf might just come tumblein' down - breaking glass - causing one to pause and wonder - is my hand span large enough to hold this pile of falling paintings while removing the glass from the floor? And then one might wonder - is this a serious enough situation to warrant waking the roommate? - and then wondering why the roommate didn't wake from the initial crash.

Well, the handspan was big enough, the roommate did not awaken, the paintings are now safely on the floor and this bloggster only suffered a tiny nick - and jangled nerves.

Now for that glass of wine (since there's nothing stronger in the house).